Inner Tube Water Polo

A whistle blows shrilly, piercing the general cacophony and signaling the start of the game. The ball thrown into the middle of the pool is immediately grabbed by one team and they're off swimming. If you can call it swimming when everyone, goalies included, is impeded by an innertube helping them stay afloat.

The pool is divided in half to allow for two games to play out simultaneously. This adds to the general feeling of chaos. Water splashes, people yell, whistles blow. All of it happens under lights that are a bit too bright, a bit too fake. Teams line up on the bleachers, waiting for their games to begin. Everyone is gripped by the games that are currently being played, cheering on their friends and heckling the competition.

Our dorm has managed to field three teams this year. No one expects much from the frosh team, but the A team is expected to win the whole season. The other dorms only have one team each, and some of them struggled to field even that many players. But the fact that every dorm has at least one team representing them speaks to the popularity of inner tube water polo. It is the intramural event of the year.

I've never played. I'm not great at sports, and even with an inner tube keeping me afloat I worry that I would drown. Or lost a contact. Or get seriously injured. It's a shame because when a girl scores it's worth twice as many points. But I don't feel too badly. It's not like we have a shortage of female players, even with three teams to fill. My roommate even plays on an actual water polo team, which gives us a huge advantage and is a big part of the reason we're expected to dominate this season.

Apart from the fact that we often dominate. We are the jock dorm, after all.

I contribute by cheering on my dorm mates and helping to keep score when it's needed. I love the chaos of this sport. I love how quickly the games move; there's a time limit on possession to make sure the ball keeps moving. I love how short the games are, lasting less than half an hour each. And I mostly love feeling like a part of it while staying dry on the sidelines, slipping in to my preferred role of cheerleader.

After the game, the entire team and spectators troop back up to the dorm together, talking, laughing, shouting, comparing plays and working out strategies. Once we reach the courtyard, we gather in a circle for the post-game chant. As one we cheer at the top of our lungs

North dorm's the best

All the rest suck

69 to Bitch

Rah rah fuck